Apparently I was supposed to know it was "shipping damage", and call them, rather than use the web repair system. My bad for misidentifying the problem.
She was going to get back to me with "a decision" on Monday, and hung up. While I was in the shower, she called back to say they'd go ahead and repair it.
I'm ever so grateful. Wonder if I'll get it back before next Friday...
And in what condition.